Catching up and Catching on

Well the past few weeks have been a whirlwind of their own!

It's coming down to the last few weeks of school and I feel like I am running on E. I am so tired and stressed but I am on the verge of making straight A's this semester. I can do it! If I can just pull my act together. I know I am approach the end when my mind gets to wandering when I should be reading or studying. I took today off so that I can wrap up some work and get some laundry done. I have also been in the process of cleaning out my room and taking some things to the goodwill. I am a person who loves to hold on to stuff but I got to thinking one day that if I get rid of some old stuff, then I can go buy new stuff. How exciting is that? :)
Last week, the company I work for announced that is was closing one of its factories which happens to be right next door to the store that I work in. Many people have flooded our doors thinking that we too are closing and we have been assured by our management department that our jobs are safe. However, I am not very inclined to believe that. So at the end of this month I will be announcing my resignation from my job to take a full time assistantship at the college that I attend. It's really been an agonizing decision as I have been working at this particular place for about 8 years. I may just do it seasonally so that its not such an abrupt departure. I will miss the job but certainly not the stress. I have enough of that in my life to hand out to the world.
Lately I have found myself in quite an odd state of mind as have been on the path to recovery after D. I have made the decision to not enter into any relationship (vanilla or D/s) for a while. When I say a while, I mean probably not before Christmas. I don't want to spend another 2-3 weeks crying every night trying to figure out what is wrong with me and not focusing on finishing this degree and getting my life back. God how I miss my life! But I don't want to go through that again. I have been chatting quite often with A. lately and even that surprises me. He says I am such a smart girl who makes such stupid decisions. That's kinda hurtful but I don't tell him so. He has come to nickname me "Alice" because he says the stories I tell are colorful and entertaining. And yet, sadly true. I think I might be Alice for Halloween this year. He has met a young girl who lives a couple hours from here and shockingly has become quite enamoured with her. When I met him I always got this feeling that he was the floater type and thus was the reason why I left him alone but now, he speaks quite highly of this girl and even has wishes for me to meet her. I am honored but then like they always do, the pangs of jealousy have crept in. Making me wonder how it is that I can stick around people so long and yet never be as good as the girl who comes months and years later. Blah. But its all good. I am sticking to my cause. No relationships. I have to get get out of school. I have to get life moving in the direction it should be.
I have recently met a man from the area who I have had quite a bit of enjoyable conversation with. He is a doctor and a married man. I know I said I would leave married men alone but I have to admit there is a bit of security here. He is more skeptical of me than I am of him and I rather like it that way. We got a hotel room for a few hours this weekend and he talked about how excited he was to have time with me. I was more excited about the prospect of getting in a nap which didn't really happen. We didn't have sex and I don't plan on ever having sex with him. He spent alot of time touching and caressing my ass. He is infatuated with it it seems. That and my breasts. Makes me wonder if his wife is a flat chested and flat booty kinda woman. It was nice but I wasn't nearly as excited as he was. It was nice to get massaged for a few hours though. He is quite interesting to talk to and he is always pushing for me to finish school even when I am ready to throw in my towel and say "fuck it". He has told me several times that he got married too young and that I was lucky to find out about this lifestyle so early. I guess there is some bonus in knowing about this early in life. Sometimes the downsides outweigh the bonuses so much that I forget that they even exist. But he is a nice man and he tells me I am beautiful all the time. He is a good diversion for me. For now anyway.