Boundaries

Yesterday I had another meeting with my client and we worked on some more of her writing skills. She has quite a bit of difficulty with reading and writing but in the last couple of sessions I have really been impressed by her thinking. She can think out a wonderful essay, its just getting it down on paper. She is always shy and withdrawn but she's started to perk up a bit when we talk. During our meeting I asked her about how mid-semester grades and she got very quiet and started to cry. I reached my arms out to hug her, as is always my natural reaction, but I had to pull myself back and simply rub her back and offer her a tissue. She told me her grades were not the best and that she was having a hard time adjusting to college life. I had to hold my own tears back because I remember what the first semester was like too. I tried to give her encouragement and dissuade her from leaving school at the end of the semester. I had to hold myself back then too. I cannot tell the client what to do. I can only provide help in making a decision. I wish I had gotten her back in the beginning of the semester. I was glad to see her really open up toward the end of the session but I was bit frustrated as well. My hands are tied. And certainly not in the good way.

I have to remember my boundaries. There are no more mock sessions with do-overs and critiques. My client is a real person, with real issues. We talk about it alot in class but until you have someone sitting in front of you, its hard to relate.

All I wanted to do was hug her. But that wasn't what she needed, that was what I needed.